Lately I've been thinking. I've been thinking a lot. I've realized that because of different stupid reasons I've pushed some of the most important people in my life away.
Trying to prove a point, I've blocked one of my best friends out. But now it's been 8 months & I think she gets the point. I'm angry!... I'm really angry. She's taken everything that's happened with my best friend's death and turned it around to make her out to be the good guy. She's tried to act as if she was there for him and as if she honestly understands what I'm going through. In no way could she be considered the good guy nor does she have any clue what I'm going through in this situation, but I think it's time to try and forgive her; I've proven my point. You know, I've realized that even though she annoys me sometimes I really do need her in my life. It's not okay for me to just cut people out of my life as soon as a problem arises between the two of us.
There are definitely certain people that you just need in your life to keep you, you. During those times when you lose touch with yourself and even the world, one conversation with friends such as these can help you find your inner self once again. We all have those friends. I just so happen to have lost touch with them because I thought I didn't need them anymore. When I came to college I found new "friends" that were really more acquaintances so when I hit rock bottom none of them wanted to be around for that. Thus that left me here, and I can't figure out who this person is that I've become. My "lost me, found me" friends used to be Deanna, Chad, Hana, Ashley, Lacey, & Vincent... I'm not really sure who they are now. I guess that's why I just feel as if I've been lost in who I really am as of late.
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